Today was sooo not the wakeup call I was hoping for. I awoke around 7:30 in the morning convinced it was raining in my room (needless to say I am none too bright first thing in the morning). I tried to go back to sleep, but I could HEAR rain and there was nothing coming down outside. After a few head shakes I heard some commotion in the hallway. Knowing it was my landlord’s day off and that they usually sleep as long as the baby lets them, I was surprised enough to investigate.
IT WAS RAINING! In the hallway! Water was pouring from the ceiling (guess I am not so dumb in the morning). Turns out it was toilet water from the lady upstairs. She overflowed her toilet and didn’t have the courtesy to come downstairs and let us know. Two buckets were filled from the overflow (which inconveniently flooded the apartment below us) and several mops were squeezed and the paint on the walls ran and towels were thrown straight into the washer and overall it was yucky.
After the interior rain I soooo went back to sleep for a bit. I had plans to spend most of the day with Ini today since he is moving to Queens tomorrow (bummer) and I wanted to be well rested for whatever we ended up doing. When got together we decided to go to dinner at a local place called Dallas BBQ. Supposedly they have ‘great’ bar-b-que, but it is sooo not Hog Wild. I ate a spinach salad with rotisserie chicken and raisins and walnuts. It wasn’t good. This is mainly because I despise spinach, but since it had been a while since my tummy ate anything greener that iceberg lettuce, I knew I needed substantial leafy things. Unfortunately, Ini knows I dislike spinach and this became a point of a mild contention. I don’t know why I do things I don’t like. I don’t know why I make decisions without thinking them through. I don’t know why I dislike onions (and won’t even nibble the vile little things). I have never had anyone challenge me to think about these things. It’s just how I have always done things, so why ponder it. If one keeps on doing things ‘just because’ eventually you find yourself on a moderately slippery slope. If I don’t ever stop to think about my decision making process and become deliberate in my choices and decision process, I will always keep doing the same things and getting the same results. I have a wonderful person who is willing to confront me about how I go about life and what is my answer? I throw a fit, cry and walk away. Brilliant and mature, I am a winner sometimes.
I know change is hard, but I think this process is worth it. I do not want to keep getting the same results. I do not want to end up looking back at my life when I am old and knowing I always took the easy path and never challenged myself out of my comfort zone; never tried to be a better person. I know I can physically move out of my comfort zone (hello, I am in Manhattan), but emotionally and mentally I stay pretty consistent. I need to fix this or else, like Ini said to me tonight, I am not going to get as much out of this experience/opportunity as I could have. From here on, here comes the hard.
Lord give me strength, help me to be willing to change my heart.
Thursday, October 8, 2009
09/24/09... Jobs (again)
I think you are all sensing a theme as you read these entries… my life revolves around job hunting these days; printing resumes, searching online, hoofing around town dropping off applications, etc. Today was more of the same, only with a bit of a twist. I headed off the island. Oh yes, that’s right… I hit up the outer boroughs. I went to the Bronx. Alone. Like a total rockstar, I got the Northbound 1 train and got off at 225th street (conveniently where Target is located). I had seen an Applebees in the strip when Ini and I had gone to Target a couple weeks ago and I figured I would give them a shot and see if they wanted my fabulousness waiting tables for them. They didn’t. But, the manager was kind enough to give me some tips on two new Applebees that are being built and that he thinks might still be hiring. I will definitely be checking those out.
While I was up in the area, I stopped at the Lane Bryant that’s up there because, frankly, I am sick of sweltering. I was not properly prepared to live in a building without a/c and for walking all over a breezeless city. So… I bought some long walking shorts today. I want to be comfy, at least for the next week while it’s still warm ;) While I was in line waiting to check out I struck up a conversation with the gal in front of me and the gal who was working (I know, I still talk to strangers…) and it came up that I was unemployed. The gal who works for the store asked me if I had any retail experience and then proceeded to let me know that this particular store is hiring a part-time assistant manager and gave me an application. This could be an amazing opportunity and I will totally be bringing this back on Monday when the store manager is in. Who would have guessed a little impulse-buying would lead to a job tip. I will keep you all posted!
While I was up in the area, I stopped at the Lane Bryant that’s up there because, frankly, I am sick of sweltering. I was not properly prepared to live in a building without a/c and for walking all over a breezeless city. So… I bought some long walking shorts today. I want to be comfy, at least for the next week while it’s still warm ;) While I was in line waiting to check out I struck up a conversation with the gal in front of me and the gal who was working (I know, I still talk to strangers…) and it came up that I was unemployed. The gal who works for the store asked me if I had any retail experience and then proceeded to let me know that this particular store is hiring a part-time assistant manager and gave me an application. This could be an amazing opportunity and I will totally be bringing this back on Monday when the store manager is in. Who would have guessed a little impulse-buying would lead to a job tip. I will keep you all posted!
09/23/09 Two week old New Yorker!
Well, here it is… two weeks in the Big Apple. I spent most of today doing the norm- Starbucks, job stuff. This is what most of my days consist of; trying to find gainful employment. As I said before I am focusing on my reality as opposed to my dreams right now. I still apply for jobs in my field (non-profit, social service type things) but am heavily focusing on entry-level restaurant or retail jobs as these are much more easily found.
Some days, like today, I suddenly get a little overwhelmed by the bigness of what it is I did when I moved here. I sold almost everything I own, my car, my furniture, household items (kitchen stuffs, décor, etc) and the list goes on. I brought what I thought to be a sufficient amount of things including a few framed photos and other comfort items, but I left things behind too; off-season clothes, art, my bread machine, shoes… And sometimes I find myself needing things that I know I used to own and may still own in a box either at my parent’s house or at my brother’s house, but they aren’t here and I am stuck either replacing them or figuring out creative alternatives to get done what I need to without spending money.
Today the straw that broke the back was realizing I hadn’t brought a single printed copy of my resume. I brought other paper things, assorted bank info and important files, but not one single copy of my stinking stupid resume. What was I thinking? To top it off, I had no idea where to go to try to print one off or make copies of it. I know it sounds dumb, but it made me feel a little overwhelmed and like I really had not a clue what I was doing here. It was a very frustrating moment for me. It’s simple things like this that seem to have the biggest effect on me. I can no longer pop in the car and dash over to my folks’ place to use their computer or printer. I can’t just stop by my friend’s house and see them. I no longer know how to get to the places I need/want to go without first referencing a map. It really is the little things…
Please don’t hear that I regret my choice. I do not. I just struggle with being patient with myself. It’s times like this that all I can do is pray for patience and for God to change my heart and help me adapt to these changes better.
Some days, like today, I suddenly get a little overwhelmed by the bigness of what it is I did when I moved here. I sold almost everything I own, my car, my furniture, household items (kitchen stuffs, décor, etc) and the list goes on. I brought what I thought to be a sufficient amount of things including a few framed photos and other comfort items, but I left things behind too; off-season clothes, art, my bread machine, shoes… And sometimes I find myself needing things that I know I used to own and may still own in a box either at my parent’s house or at my brother’s house, but they aren’t here and I am stuck either replacing them or figuring out creative alternatives to get done what I need to without spending money.
Today the straw that broke the back was realizing I hadn’t brought a single printed copy of my resume. I brought other paper things, assorted bank info and important files, but not one single copy of my stinking stupid resume. What was I thinking? To top it off, I had no idea where to go to try to print one off or make copies of it. I know it sounds dumb, but it made me feel a little overwhelmed and like I really had not a clue what I was doing here. It was a very frustrating moment for me. It’s simple things like this that seem to have the biggest effect on me. I can no longer pop in the car and dash over to my folks’ place to use their computer or printer. I can’t just stop by my friend’s house and see them. I no longer know how to get to the places I need/want to go without first referencing a map. It really is the little things…
Please don’t hear that I regret my choice. I do not. I just struggle with being patient with myself. It’s times like this that all I can do is pray for patience and for God to change my heart and help me adapt to these changes better.
Friday, October 2, 2009
9/22/09- I have plans :)
Ok, I didn't know I had plans when I woke up, so that comes later in the story. What I knew when I woke up was that I was heading to Times Square to drop off all the applications Ini and I picked up on Friday. I ran around (and had to call him for directions twice) to several restaurants. When I dropped off the application at Bubba Gumps they asked me to stay for an interview! Sweet! Of course I stayed. I think it went well, they said it was a three-part process, so now comes the waiting... I stink at waiting, but I will keep working on finding a job while waiting to hear from them.
When I finished downtown I headed to 125th to waste some time til Ini got back to Queens. I almost never buy anything, but today I picked up a new pair of black flats. I had ruined the ones I brought with me wandering in Central Park looking for Ini's phone on Sunday night. He thought he had left it on the bench, we went back to look for it. It was in his bag the whole time, but running like a couple of crazies in the park searching for a not-really-lost iphone was exciting none the less.
After picking up my hecka cute new flats (from Payless... darn convenient national chains), I was heading home when I got a text. Ok, follow me on this rabbit trail. Before I left MI, a gal from my church, Theresa G. had told me she had a niece who lived in Manhattan and Theresa was nice enough to connect me with her niece via facebook. Jacqueline, the niece and I had messaged a few times but had not yet gotten together. Well… guess who was texting me? Jacqueline!!! She invited me to a friend’s birthday party that night downtown on 34th St and 5th Avenue at a real new York brewery! I, of course, said yes. I HAVE PLANS!
So, now I am heading to my first real New York outing. Have I mentioned I am from Michigan? I don’t know what one wears to a birthday party at a New York brewery. After a few country-bumpkin texts to Jacqueline, I deduced there was no need to be super dressy, but cuteness was expected. Oy! I went in a denim skirt and cardigan, looking cutesy but far from city chic. I need to work on this once I get employed, I don’t want to be a bumpkin my entire life!
Anyways, once the clothes were sorted and I had directions to where I needed to go I was off! I took the subway (alone) downtown (at night) and then walked over to 5th Ave. What Jacqueline had failed to mention was that this brewery was ON THE FIRST FLOOR OF THE EMPIRE STATE BUILDING!!!!!! How wicked sweet is that?? After meeting up with Jacqueline, we headed inside with Brett, a stranger who had asked us for directions and who she invited along to the party. We finally found her friends and the rest was just fun. I talked to a couple visiting from England about US tipping customs (they were at the bar, not with our group), I met several new people and even got 2 business cards (people really give you their cards here). It was so much fun. Just a chill night of hanging out and socializing with new folks, I actually forgot that I was a bumpkin and felt like one of the group… awesome :)
Below is a picture of us at the brewery that night…
Jacqueline, Me, Anthony (the birthday boy) Brendan, and ummm... I forget (oops!)
When I finished downtown I headed to 125th to waste some time til Ini got back to Queens. I almost never buy anything, but today I picked up a new pair of black flats. I had ruined the ones I brought with me wandering in Central Park looking for Ini's phone on Sunday night. He thought he had left it on the bench, we went back to look for it. It was in his bag the whole time, but running like a couple of crazies in the park searching for a not-really-lost iphone was exciting none the less.
After picking up my hecka cute new flats (from Payless... darn convenient national chains), I was heading home when I got a text. Ok, follow me on this rabbit trail. Before I left MI, a gal from my church, Theresa G. had told me she had a niece who lived in Manhattan and Theresa was nice enough to connect me with her niece via facebook. Jacqueline, the niece and I had messaged a few times but had not yet gotten together. Well… guess who was texting me? Jacqueline!!! She invited me to a friend’s birthday party that night downtown on 34th St and 5th Avenue at a real new York brewery! I, of course, said yes. I HAVE PLANS!
So, now I am heading to my first real New York outing. Have I mentioned I am from Michigan? I don’t know what one wears to a birthday party at a New York brewery. After a few country-bumpkin texts to Jacqueline, I deduced there was no need to be super dressy, but cuteness was expected. Oy! I went in a denim skirt and cardigan, looking cutesy but far from city chic. I need to work on this once I get employed, I don’t want to be a bumpkin my entire life!
Anyways, once the clothes were sorted and I had directions to where I needed to go I was off! I took the subway (alone) downtown (at night) and then walked over to 5th Ave. What Jacqueline had failed to mention was that this brewery was ON THE FIRST FLOOR OF THE EMPIRE STATE BUILDING!!!!!! How wicked sweet is that?? After meeting up with Jacqueline, we headed inside with Brett, a stranger who had asked us for directions and who she invited along to the party. We finally found her friends and the rest was just fun. I talked to a couple visiting from England about US tipping customs (they were at the bar, not with our group), I met several new people and even got 2 business cards (people really give you their cards here). It was so much fun. Just a chill night of hanging out and socializing with new folks, I actually forgot that I was a bumpkin and felt like one of the group… awesome :)
Below is a picture of us at the brewery that night…
Jacqueline, Me, Anthony (the birthday boy) Brendan, and ummm... I forget (oops!)
9/21/09- Pure Productivity
Whoa baby... today was a lesson in insane productivity! I spent almost 9 hours at Starbucks today doing job stuff, sending resume's applying on line, just overall being a rockstar. I have to do these things at Starbucks because I don't ummm... have internet at home anymore. I used to... I 'borrowed' from my neighbors. They found out. They banned me. I am sad. All I did was hog their entire bandwidth, sheesh! I resent their unwillingness to share with me! Not really, I totally understand them not wanting me to borrow anymore, especially since they don't know who I am and I don't know them. But this explains the delays in my updates. I have to lug the laptop 4.5 blocks to my local Starbucks in order to access internet.
Bear with me... I will get better :)
Bear with me... I will get better :)
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
9/20/09- City-wide Adventures :)
Ahhhh... Quality time with my only real friend in the city! Can't be beat. After several days of either not seeing him at all or barely seeing him, I was surely missing my buddy. We had decided earlier in the week that today was going to be a day-long hang out doing whatever we felt like. We met up in the early afternoon once we were both up and functioning and headed to Gristedes to get some lunch. Gristedes is a local grocery store with a killer deli section. For like $3 you can get a whole meal including a quarter chicken and pasta with some sort of veggie topping. Not shabby and it's more than enough food to fill you up. I picked the Penne a la Vodka from the cold case and Ini got the aforementioned Chicken Dinner Thing. Now the tough part.. where to consume our purchases?
We hit the bus and headed North, ending up at another new park; Fort Tryon Park in the Cloisters. It's a mere 18 blocks from my place, but like a whole new world. As I live in the middle of a business district, I am always a little taken aback when I end up in residential neighborhoods. They are so quiet, and peaceful even in the daytime. The rush of people to which I am accustomed is nonexistent. There are trees and sidewalks with enough room to move, playgrounds, schools and churches. Such a difference from the blocks filled with bodegas and laundromats and groceries and vendors and restaurants that I usually see.
Fort Tryon Park was insanely beautiful... about 50 feet inside the gates no buildings were visible in any direction, just trees and gardens and stone retaining walls and green... so so so much green! I really need to start photographing the things I see so I can share them with all of you. I tried to take some today at the park, but my camera was full and it didnt make sense to stand there and miss the view while fiddling with my camera. (I did catch some pics on the way out and those are below)
We walked a little deeper into the park and found this plateau area with benches and an amazing view of the Hudson River and a wooded portion of New Jersey. The only building visible was a house built into the side of the hill on the Jersey side of the river. Here we ate lunch while watching people set up for a wedding behind us. It was so serene to be eating outside, listening to the wind in the trees, not hearing ambulances (I live 2 blocks South of New York Presbyterian Hospital) or horns honking... just birds and breeze and children.
After sitting and enjoying the view for a while we headed off via bus to Starbucks to do a little work before continuing our day of fun. We had barely sat down when Ini got a phone call. He had left his wallet on the bus! Some guy named Andrew had found it and wanted to return it. We hadn't even realized his wallet was missing til this call came. We packed up just as quickly as we had arrived and headed down to Amsterdam and 109th St to meet up with this guy and collect Ini's wallet. Praise God for Good Samaritans! We took the train and missed our stop, ending up 7 blocks down from where we needed be.
Since Ini was on a mission my short legs couldn't keep up. I decided to explore the area I had found myself in while he ran to catch this guy before he had to leave. I wandered west of where the train had let us off and realized I was in the middle of the Spanish Harlem Projects and the sun was setting... bugger! I kept heading West through the projects looking for cross streets with names I recognized. I finally found Amsterdam and headed North towards where I knew Ini was. At 104th I found a playground with benches that looked reasonably safe to sit for a moment while I waited for Ini to come collect me. I kept myself busy making no eye contact for about 15 minutes til he called and told me he was heading my directions. It wasn't til he arrived and I exited the park that I realized I was a big, bad law-breaker! Posted right next to the enterance of the park was a sign that read 'No Adults Allowed on Park Property Unless Accompanied By a Child.' What can I say? Living in the City has given me a new wild-streak ;)
Once we reunited, we walked back towards where we had started, no real destination in mind. As we wandered through the Projects, I found a fun little area full of elephant statues. Turns out they were really sprinklers. Needless to say, I climbed on one. Ini had my camera and this is what we ended up with... Good Grief! *Note the poor fellas broken nose :(*
There you go... photographic proof that I rode a stone elephant :)
After elephant riding we headed downtown. I had told Ini I wanted to go somewhere cool that we didn't have to spend any money to do, We got off the bus at 59th St.We headed west and grabbed a quick burger before going back to where we had gotten off the bus. I should make mention that I am amazingly oblivious when I am walking around with someone else, especially if I have no idea where I am going and I am simply following. So when we first arrived at 59th St. I had totally missed that we were in the middle of Columbus Circle. I missed the fountains and the Trump Tower with it's giant gold globe, the Time Warner Building and EVERYTHING! Good grief! I am constantly surprised by the beauty of this place as seen by the following photos...
As soon as we finished our impromptu photo shoot, we headed into the far South West corner of Central Park which conveniently starts at Columbus Circle. The park is indescribable at night. So different from the daytime. Obviously, this was a different spot from where we had gone last week, but still... the whole feel changes when the sun goes down. I saw a woman who carried her entire life in a suitcase that she rested her head atop. I saw a couple canoodling in the shadows and several horse drawn carriages. I watched a small band have a late-night jam session with a few strangers crowded around enjoying the sound their guitars made. And, I saw stars... Not movie stars, night sky stars. Only a few, but more than I had seen since I first arrived here.
I think what I really love about the parks we go to, especially the ones we visit at night is the peace. The calm in the midst of a storm. It's a bit like the feeling I used to get when I would visit Lake Michigan in the Winter back home. I used to love to go to the beach in January, especially on gray, cloudy days. The sky matches the water and there is gray as far as the eye can see. Sometimes, the waves are even frozen in place and you get this sense of calmed chaos, of feeling small and insignificant... of sensing in some little way the size and power of God. If you have never done this, I strongly recommend that you try it sometime... just go and be awed by it all. I feel that same way here in these oases of green surrounded by towers of concrete. I sense God. I see the awesomeness of His creation and feel the power of His hand. It's the first time in my life that these feelings have been spurred by land and not by water.
As we sat in awe together, enjoying the end of our day together I realized that I am home. I am happy and I am making a life for myself. I no longer feel like a visitor, I feel like I belong. Here's a photo of the Trump Globe and one of Ini and me, so you can put a face with his name :)
We hit the bus and headed North, ending up at another new park; Fort Tryon Park in the Cloisters. It's a mere 18 blocks from my place, but like a whole new world. As I live in the middle of a business district, I am always a little taken aback when I end up in residential neighborhoods. They are so quiet, and peaceful even in the daytime. The rush of people to which I am accustomed is nonexistent. There are trees and sidewalks with enough room to move, playgrounds, schools and churches. Such a difference from the blocks filled with bodegas and laundromats and groceries and vendors and restaurants that I usually see.
Fort Tryon Park was insanely beautiful... about 50 feet inside the gates no buildings were visible in any direction, just trees and gardens and stone retaining walls and green... so so so much green! I really need to start photographing the things I see so I can share them with all of you. I tried to take some today at the park, but my camera was full and it didnt make sense to stand there and miss the view while fiddling with my camera. (I did catch some pics on the way out and those are below)
We walked a little deeper into the park and found this plateau area with benches and an amazing view of the Hudson River and a wooded portion of New Jersey. The only building visible was a house built into the side of the hill on the Jersey side of the river. Here we ate lunch while watching people set up for a wedding behind us. It was so serene to be eating outside, listening to the wind in the trees, not hearing ambulances (I live 2 blocks South of New York Presbyterian Hospital) or horns honking... just birds and breeze and children.
After sitting and enjoying the view for a while we headed off via bus to Starbucks to do a little work before continuing our day of fun. We had barely sat down when Ini got a phone call. He had left his wallet on the bus! Some guy named Andrew had found it and wanted to return it. We hadn't even realized his wallet was missing til this call came. We packed up just as quickly as we had arrived and headed down to Amsterdam and 109th St to meet up with this guy and collect Ini's wallet. Praise God for Good Samaritans! We took the train and missed our stop, ending up 7 blocks down from where we needed be.
Since Ini was on a mission my short legs couldn't keep up. I decided to explore the area I had found myself in while he ran to catch this guy before he had to leave. I wandered west of where the train had let us off and realized I was in the middle of the Spanish Harlem Projects and the sun was setting... bugger! I kept heading West through the projects looking for cross streets with names I recognized. I finally found Amsterdam and headed North towards where I knew Ini was. At 104th I found a playground with benches that looked reasonably safe to sit for a moment while I waited for Ini to come collect me. I kept myself busy making no eye contact for about 15 minutes til he called and told me he was heading my directions. It wasn't til he arrived and I exited the park that I realized I was a big, bad law-breaker! Posted right next to the enterance of the park was a sign that read 'No Adults Allowed on Park Property Unless Accompanied By a Child.' What can I say? Living in the City has given me a new wild-streak ;)
Once we reunited, we walked back towards where we had started, no real destination in mind. As we wandered through the Projects, I found a fun little area full of elephant statues. Turns out they were really sprinklers. Needless to say, I climbed on one. Ini had my camera and this is what we ended up with... Good Grief! *Note the poor fellas broken nose :(*
There you go... photographic proof that I rode a stone elephant :)
After elephant riding we headed downtown. I had told Ini I wanted to go somewhere cool that we didn't have to spend any money to do, We got off the bus at 59th St.We headed west and grabbed a quick burger before going back to where we had gotten off the bus. I should make mention that I am amazingly oblivious when I am walking around with someone else, especially if I have no idea where I am going and I am simply following. So when we first arrived at 59th St. I had totally missed that we were in the middle of Columbus Circle. I missed the fountains and the Trump Tower with it's giant gold globe, the Time Warner Building and EVERYTHING! Good grief! I am constantly surprised by the beauty of this place as seen by the following photos...
As soon as we finished our impromptu photo shoot, we headed into the far South West corner of Central Park which conveniently starts at Columbus Circle. The park is indescribable at night. So different from the daytime. Obviously, this was a different spot from where we had gone last week, but still... the whole feel changes when the sun goes down. I saw a woman who carried her entire life in a suitcase that she rested her head atop. I saw a couple canoodling in the shadows and several horse drawn carriages. I watched a small band have a late-night jam session with a few strangers crowded around enjoying the sound their guitars made. And, I saw stars... Not movie stars, night sky stars. Only a few, but more than I had seen since I first arrived here.
I think what I really love about the parks we go to, especially the ones we visit at night is the peace. The calm in the midst of a storm. It's a bit like the feeling I used to get when I would visit Lake Michigan in the Winter back home. I used to love to go to the beach in January, especially on gray, cloudy days. The sky matches the water and there is gray as far as the eye can see. Sometimes, the waves are even frozen in place and you get this sense of calmed chaos, of feeling small and insignificant... of sensing in some little way the size and power of God. If you have never done this, I strongly recommend that you try it sometime... just go and be awed by it all. I feel that same way here in these oases of green surrounded by towers of concrete. I sense God. I see the awesomeness of His creation and feel the power of His hand. It's the first time in my life that these feelings have been spurred by land and not by water.
As we sat in awe together, enjoying the end of our day together I realized that I am home. I am happy and I am making a life for myself. I no longer feel like a visitor, I feel like I belong. Here's a photo of the Trump Globe and one of Ini and me, so you can put a face with his name :)
9/19/09- Randomness
Well, I slept for crap last night. My movie marathon combined with the party above my room gave me a migraine, so I definitely saw 6am come by. Grrrr... I dislike being so disoriented in my sleep habits. I think it is time for some Tylenol PM in my life, or Unisom or something. I need to sleep like a human being and not like a Vampire. I have always had trouble sleeping on a 'normal' schedule, ever since I was little. My brother tells me this is because when we picked our rooms in our Lafayette, IN house he picked the one with morning sun, and I picked the one with evening sun and since the age of 5 have been slowly but surely turning more and more into a Vampire. Bummer deal... Whatever the root cause, the older I get the harder it wears on me. I frequently forget things I do because I am usually functioning while incredibly overtired. I tend to fight sleep like a toddler too, as I hate the idea that I might miss out on something while I sleep. I try to burn both ends, but usually end up cashing out for an embarrassingly long period of time when I finally hit the point of no-function. Before I moved it was never a big deal, I worked til super late, came home, vegged out, and passed out. Woke up in the morning and went back to work. I used my two days off a week to catch up on sleep and house-stuff. Not having a job, I feel little motivation to haul my buns out of bed in the morning these days. I sleep til super late and stay up half the next night, but last night was ridiculous. Something has to give, I cannot keep doing this to my mind or my body. I know getting a job will help, but until said job occurs, I have to make some changes.
That being said, once I did wake up today, I had nada to really do. Ini was back downtown taking care of his business stuffs so I was flying solo. When in doubt... wander.
I headed back down to 125th to wander through the same stores I had gone through yesterday. Didnt buy anything, just tried stuff on and window shopped. Overall a pretty boring day. Revamped my resume again, this time gearing a version especially for nannying. Not too much else to add... Can't wait for tomorrow... Ini and I are hanging out all day long! I need some good quality conversation and human interaction :)
That being said, once I did wake up today, I had nada to really do. Ini was back downtown taking care of his business stuffs so I was flying solo. When in doubt... wander.
I headed back down to 125th to wander through the same stores I had gone through yesterday. Didnt buy anything, just tried stuff on and window shopped. Overall a pretty boring day. Revamped my resume again, this time gearing a version especially for nannying. Not too much else to add... Can't wait for tomorrow... Ini and I are hanging out all day long! I need some good quality conversation and human interaction :)
09/18/09- Shopping Extravaganza and Times Square
This morning I woke early, got cute and met up with Ini to head downtown to Times Square. We were on a mission for applications. I may have dreamed about coming out here and falling into some amazing, degree-utilizing, kingdom-furthering position, but ideals and reality are seldom in cahoots. The reality is that getting any 'real' 9-5 job is going to take time and considerable effort. I do not lack in the latter, but time is rather crucial given my situation. I am 800 miles from home with no source of consistent income. Oh sure, I have savings, but I also need to feel productive and I do not want to live til my last dime. That all being said, I decided to fall back on what I know I am good at: Serving and customer service. So, this morning I headed off to try to break into the world of downtown restaurants. We went to Applebees (duh!) in Times Square. I had spoken to the manager here before I moved and he told me to come in when I arrived, unfortunately he was busy. We also hit up TGIFridays and Ruby Tuesday and Dallas BBQ (a chain specializing in, amazingly, BBQ and rotisserie chicken). A lot of places were quite honest about their position, i.e. "we aren't hiring," but it's ok to try, especially since all of them have more than one location in the city.
When we had made our circuit, Ini got me back to the train and then left me to go see about some business of his own, promising to pick me up an application from Bubba Gump Shrimp Co (a family style restaurant based on the movie Forrest Gump, complete with movie memorabilia). I was on my own in Times Square! Ok, not really. I was a little too nervous to get back out of the subway station, at a high risk of getting turned around and lost. I dont know what it is about big cities; in my neighborhood, I know my directions, I know intrinsically where North is. I dont get lost, even after getting out of the subway (ok, that took a few tries). Once I get downtown, be in in Manhattan, Chicago or Grand Rapids I am suddenly at a directional loss. Personally I blame it on an excessive amount of concrete and my inability to sense such things as bodies of water or the sun's placement in the sky. Either way, I easily get turned around in the middle of downtown areas and decided to stay put in the subway.
Since it was Friday and I had all weekend to fill out the applications and prepare to bring them back on Monday (I refuse to drop by places of business on the weekends to seek a job, it seems tacky to me, so I do most of my 'real' job work on the weekends and my more customer service-based things Monday through Thursday), I decided to head back to 125th St in Harlem and do a little shopping.
Before you think it, I will say it. Shopping while I dont have any source of steady income does not seem to be the most frugal of ideas. Sometimes though, a girl just needs a little distraction. That's all :) And Harlem is full of cheap distractions! I had seen a few things I liked when I was there with Ini the other day and now I kind of wanted to explore on my own. I got up from the subway and just headed right. Luckily, this was the direction I wanted to be going in :) I found Old Navy and a few other chains, but I was zeroing in on those local discount stores I had seen further East. I stopped in every store I passed just to look. I ended up in this place called High Energy which had some cute stuff, most of it too trendy for me. I lean more towards classic items that can be worn year after year and no one has to know how many seasons old they are.
*Editors Note: Fellas, ignore the next paragraph*
The following little blurb is to demonstrate how not-bad I really am being here when I go shopping. Before I moved, I got rid of most of my bras, they didn't fit and they were no longer comfy. However, I have only ever been able to find my bras at Lane Bryant as I am a more unusual size. This is all fine and good, except a bra can easily set me back $40 bucks at that store, as I was saving for my move, I never bought new ones before I left and I arrived here in Manhattan with one really old one and two new ones I had purchased off ebay that I really didn't like. I was in need. Obviously, this shopping had not occurred with Ini when we were last here, but I had noticed my size floating around at a few places. At High Energy, I bought a total of 5, count them, FIVE, new bras for a total of $22! Have I told you how much I love the cheap shopping here? Blows my mind!
After wandering all the way to the end of the major shopping, I hitched a ride on the Bx15 back to broadway where I caught the M4 bus back home... good times good times. A movie marathon and a quiet night at home were waiting for me :)
When we had made our circuit, Ini got me back to the train and then left me to go see about some business of his own, promising to pick me up an application from Bubba Gump Shrimp Co (a family style restaurant based on the movie Forrest Gump, complete with movie memorabilia). I was on my own in Times Square! Ok, not really. I was a little too nervous to get back out of the subway station, at a high risk of getting turned around and lost. I dont know what it is about big cities; in my neighborhood, I know my directions, I know intrinsically where North is. I dont get lost, even after getting out of the subway (ok, that took a few tries). Once I get downtown, be in in Manhattan, Chicago or Grand Rapids I am suddenly at a directional loss. Personally I blame it on an excessive amount of concrete and my inability to sense such things as bodies of water or the sun's placement in the sky. Either way, I easily get turned around in the middle of downtown areas and decided to stay put in the subway.
Since it was Friday and I had all weekend to fill out the applications and prepare to bring them back on Monday (I refuse to drop by places of business on the weekends to seek a job, it seems tacky to me, so I do most of my 'real' job work on the weekends and my more customer service-based things Monday through Thursday), I decided to head back to 125th St in Harlem and do a little shopping.
Before you think it, I will say it. Shopping while I dont have any source of steady income does not seem to be the most frugal of ideas. Sometimes though, a girl just needs a little distraction. That's all :) And Harlem is full of cheap distractions! I had seen a few things I liked when I was there with Ini the other day and now I kind of wanted to explore on my own. I got up from the subway and just headed right. Luckily, this was the direction I wanted to be going in :) I found Old Navy and a few other chains, but I was zeroing in on those local discount stores I had seen further East. I stopped in every store I passed just to look. I ended up in this place called High Energy which had some cute stuff, most of it too trendy for me. I lean more towards classic items that can be worn year after year and no one has to know how many seasons old they are.
*Editors Note: Fellas, ignore the next paragraph*
The following little blurb is to demonstrate how not-bad I really am being here when I go shopping. Before I moved, I got rid of most of my bras, they didn't fit and they were no longer comfy. However, I have only ever been able to find my bras at Lane Bryant as I am a more unusual size. This is all fine and good, except a bra can easily set me back $40 bucks at that store, as I was saving for my move, I never bought new ones before I left and I arrived here in Manhattan with one really old one and two new ones I had purchased off ebay that I really didn't like. I was in need. Obviously, this shopping had not occurred with Ini when we were last here, but I had noticed my size floating around at a few places. At High Energy, I bought a total of 5, count them, FIVE, new bras for a total of $22! Have I told you how much I love the cheap shopping here? Blows my mind!
After wandering all the way to the end of the major shopping, I hitched a ride on the Bx15 back to broadway where I caught the M4 bus back home... good times good times. A movie marathon and a quiet night at home were waiting for me :)
9/17/09 It's Laundry Day!!
Well, I have officially lived in my apartment for a week today, I love it more everyday, especially now that I am finally settling in. I have been unpacked since my first day in the room, but I am always finding more practical ways to keep things. It's a challenge with any new space to figure out how to best store and arrange your stuff. Usually I run to Wal-Mart and stock up on Rubbermade drawer units and baskets and shelves and the like. This time... not so much. I am trying to live more simply, so despite my intense love of storage containers and organizational supplies (it really is a sick love affair, I can spend hours walking through these aisles at any store imagining how practical each piece would be and how lovely it would be to have a place that I could organize with each little stack-able cabinet and set of drawers) I am avoiding buying any of my usual fun-stuffs and living with what was provided me.
In spite of what I considered to be a minimal amount of things brought with me, I still have amassed a full bag of laundry in the last week... So, today, it was off to the laundromat! One of thhe many fun little perks of Manhattan is no in-apartment laundry. So after filling two squeeze-top water bottles up with detergent and softener (I was soooo not lugging the family-sized bottles I had bought with me), I threw my bag over my shoulder and walked 3 blocks to the laundromat.
I will stop here to toot my own horn for a quick moment. Before I left MI, I picked up a few things I thought might be practical to have here in the city. One was this awesome canvas laundry bag, complete with shoulder strap, hidden quarter pocket and an external pocket for soap/softener. I am a little brilliant sometimes! I will also go on to say that there are laundromats that are a little closer to my apartment, but I google-mapped local laundromats and this one had a 4.5 star rating for cleanliness, equipment and polite service, so I was willing to walk a little farther in order to go somewhere I knew was decent.
Horn-tooting is over now, thank you for bearing with me. I think it is important to mention I have never in my life been to a laundromat. Oh sure, I had communal laundry in my college dorms and in the sorority I lived in, but I have never packed my stuff and hauled it out of my place of residence to wash my skivvies in front of strangers. It was quite the experience! First off, there were about 7 other people in the shop when I arrived and I had no quarters. Well, I had some, but the wash machines cost $4.25! I was not sufficiently prepared. After walking outside and trying to figure out where I could acquire a roll (or three) of quarters, I went back inside, armed with some cash and found a change machine. I was back in business.
I hadnt though to sort my laundry prior to my arrival at the 'mat so I tried to be as discreet as possible as I sifted through my dirty stuff. I must have looked like a crazy lady as I tried to hide all my personal things under shirts and towels. Good grief! I really ought to think about how I look to the outside world sometimes before I do things.
Once I had finished surreptitiously sorting my warms from my colds (I never did put much credence in whites and colors, only in what I can afford to shrink and what I can't), I stuffed my things in two machines that were conveniently next to each other. Uh... now what? The quarters wouldn't go in and the door wouldn't close. Didnt the dumb thing know that I WANTED to give it my money?? Sheesh! I had to give up my pride and ask for help. I picked a gal who looked to be about my age and seemed open enough to conversation and asked her for help. Apparently, quarters don't go in til the door is closed. Since my door wouldn't close (it really wasn't me... it really WAS broken), I couldn't put in my quarters. After wrapping my laundry in a towel, I was able to move it all to a machine that wasn't stupid and broken and no one had to see my skivs! Mission accomplished!
Now, all one does is sit and wait. Some people seemed to leave and come back when the final spin cycle was completed... not me, I watched those machines like a hawk! I was not about to play stupid-white-girl in the laundromat. I would leave with all the clothes I lugged and hopefully nothing extra (I did end up with a 'lovely' see-through thong that was freakishly small- washed and dried on my dime now- that I totally had not arrived with). My new friend (Patricia) kept me company through both rinse and spin cycles and the beginning of my drying. I feel the need to mention that drying is incredibly cheap, only a quarter per 8 minutes (32 minutes does it for most everything), so despite the cost of washing, it ends up not being so bad. After she left I was left with the now familiar issue of not wanting the whole world to see my skivs. I honestly do not know why the concept bothers me so much, at least they would all know I wear them and its not like I wear anything scandalous, being a much bigger fan of function over fashion when it comes to my undergarments. All I know is it bugs me. My solution, be THAT girl... pull everything out of the dryer one piece at a time and fold it then once I have a semi-decent stack, putting said stack in the laundry bag before grabbing handfuls of socks, and skivs and shoving them into the side of the bag to be folded in the privacy of my room. I say I am THAT girl because the laundromat provides these convenient baskets to load your dried clothes into so that those waiting for dryers may load their stuff while you wheel yours out of the way and fold off to the side. I ignored these baskets and did things my way. I am pretty sure I made no new friends in this process, but oh well. My undies were safe from public view! I conquered the 'mat and lived to tell the tale!
After this huge accomplishment, I felt pretty ok spending the rest of the day at Starbucks doing job-stuff and being productive in other ways. Oh, and since I promised to keep you updated, I did email that lady, sans photo, and she replied requesting a formal resume and color photo, which I skeptically sent (by far not my most attractive photo)and I have not heard from her again. Which is honestly okay. I didn't really want to watch her kids 60 hours a week, plus two weekends a month plus three mandatory vacations annually anyway. I would like a LIFE, where I still get to play like I have no babies.
In spite of what I considered to be a minimal amount of things brought with me, I still have amassed a full bag of laundry in the last week... So, today, it was off to the laundromat! One of thhe many fun little perks of Manhattan is no in-apartment laundry. So after filling two squeeze-top water bottles up with detergent and softener (I was soooo not lugging the family-sized bottles I had bought with me), I threw my bag over my shoulder and walked 3 blocks to the laundromat.
I will stop here to toot my own horn for a quick moment. Before I left MI, I picked up a few things I thought might be practical to have here in the city. One was this awesome canvas laundry bag, complete with shoulder strap, hidden quarter pocket and an external pocket for soap/softener. I am a little brilliant sometimes! I will also go on to say that there are laundromats that are a little closer to my apartment, but I google-mapped local laundromats and this one had a 4.5 star rating for cleanliness, equipment and polite service, so I was willing to walk a little farther in order to go somewhere I knew was decent.
Horn-tooting is over now, thank you for bearing with me. I think it is important to mention I have never in my life been to a laundromat. Oh sure, I had communal laundry in my college dorms and in the sorority I lived in, but I have never packed my stuff and hauled it out of my place of residence to wash my skivvies in front of strangers. It was quite the experience! First off, there were about 7 other people in the shop when I arrived and I had no quarters. Well, I had some, but the wash machines cost $4.25! I was not sufficiently prepared. After walking outside and trying to figure out where I could acquire a roll (or three) of quarters, I went back inside, armed with some cash and found a change machine. I was back in business.
I hadnt though to sort my laundry prior to my arrival at the 'mat so I tried to be as discreet as possible as I sifted through my dirty stuff. I must have looked like a crazy lady as I tried to hide all my personal things under shirts and towels. Good grief! I really ought to think about how I look to the outside world sometimes before I do things.
Once I had finished surreptitiously sorting my warms from my colds (I never did put much credence in whites and colors, only in what I can afford to shrink and what I can't), I stuffed my things in two machines that were conveniently next to each other. Uh... now what? The quarters wouldn't go in and the door wouldn't close. Didnt the dumb thing know that I WANTED to give it my money?? Sheesh! I had to give up my pride and ask for help. I picked a gal who looked to be about my age and seemed open enough to conversation and asked her for help. Apparently, quarters don't go in til the door is closed. Since my door wouldn't close (it really wasn't me... it really WAS broken), I couldn't put in my quarters. After wrapping my laundry in a towel, I was able to move it all to a machine that wasn't stupid and broken and no one had to see my skivs! Mission accomplished!
Now, all one does is sit and wait. Some people seemed to leave and come back when the final spin cycle was completed... not me, I watched those machines like a hawk! I was not about to play stupid-white-girl in the laundromat. I would leave with all the clothes I lugged and hopefully nothing extra (I did end up with a 'lovely' see-through thong that was freakishly small- washed and dried on my dime now- that I totally had not arrived with). My new friend (Patricia) kept me company through both rinse and spin cycles and the beginning of my drying. I feel the need to mention that drying is incredibly cheap, only a quarter per 8 minutes (32 minutes does it for most everything), so despite the cost of washing, it ends up not being so bad. After she left I was left with the now familiar issue of not wanting the whole world to see my skivs. I honestly do not know why the concept bothers me so much, at least they would all know I wear them and its not like I wear anything scandalous, being a much bigger fan of function over fashion when it comes to my undergarments. All I know is it bugs me. My solution, be THAT girl... pull everything out of the dryer one piece at a time and fold it then once I have a semi-decent stack, putting said stack in the laundry bag before grabbing handfuls of socks, and skivs and shoving them into the side of the bag to be folded in the privacy of my room. I say I am THAT girl because the laundromat provides these convenient baskets to load your dried clothes into so that those waiting for dryers may load their stuff while you wheel yours out of the way and fold off to the side. I ignored these baskets and did things my way. I am pretty sure I made no new friends in this process, but oh well. My undies were safe from public view! I conquered the 'mat and lived to tell the tale!
After this huge accomplishment, I felt pretty ok spending the rest of the day at Starbucks doing job-stuff and being productive in other ways. Oh, and since I promised to keep you updated, I did email that lady, sans photo, and she replied requesting a formal resume and color photo, which I skeptically sent (by far not my most attractive photo)and I have not heard from her again. Which is honestly okay. I didn't really want to watch her kids 60 hours a week, plus two weekends a month plus three mandatory vacations annually anyway. I would like a LIFE, where I still get to play like I have no babies.
9/16/09 My one week anniversary
*Quick editors note: I am so sorry to have left y'all hanging so long. I cannot remember everything I have done the past 2 weeks, so I may have to leave out a few days due to my poor memory, but dont fret, the big stuff will be noted :)*
Wow... I cannot believe it has been a week since I stepped off the train at Penn Station and into the arms of Manhattan. I certainly feel like it was more than 7 mere days ago. Whereas I dont feel like I have changed much in the last week, I'm sure I have in some ways. I am making a new home here and I am adjusting appropriately to my new environment. I still smile at people, and hold open doors for mama's with strollers but I no longer expect a 'thank you' in return. I still say hello when I pass someone in my building, but I no longer expect to hear a response in English. I guess I am adapting.
I have gotten used to not seeing the same shoppes we had back home and I am slowly getting used to be the neighborhood minority (how odd!) I am learning my way around. Today was a little experiment in Harlem for me (Ini was with me, so all was good). I had heard before I came out here about all the changes in Harlem and the gentrification of this old, cultural hub of a neighborhood. Today I saw it first hand. Local stores being pushed out by national chains like H&M and Foot Locker and McDonalds. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy seeing familiar places (Hello, Target!) but there is something to be said about the generic feeling a neighborhood takes on when everything begins to look like everywhere else. The flavor is lost and all turns to vanilla. It's kind of sad.
What is NOT sad however is the local shopping that is left in the area. The local mega-stores that have sales and prices usually reserved for thrift stores. I have always loved finding great deals, and Harlem's 125th street is amazing for this kind of shopping. I daresay it's cheaper and more fun than Michigan shopping :)
After this amazing extravaganza of rack raking, Ini and I returned uptown to check out a new park we hadn't yet hit up. No clue what it was called, but basically, we found ourselves in a kiddie park complete with slides, monkey bars and rope ladders. Luckily there were benches and we were able to sit down and talk without looking too weird. After a while though no matter how inconspicuous one tries to be the reality of being an adult without children in the middle of a playground starts to make the creeper feeling set in, so we headed home earlier than usual.
Upon getting home I got an email from a gal about my nanny posting on craigslist. WOOHOO!! I could be days away from getting a job! I don't know though because as one of her prerequisites according to HER want ad, which she was polite enough to send me in response to MY want ad, she wants a 'recent color photograph included' in my response. Seems a little odd to me, but we will see, if looking at my purty face makes her want to give me a job, I want to know I at least tried... I'll keep you all posted!
Wow... I cannot believe it has been a week since I stepped off the train at Penn Station and into the arms of Manhattan. I certainly feel like it was more than 7 mere days ago. Whereas I dont feel like I have changed much in the last week, I'm sure I have in some ways. I am making a new home here and I am adjusting appropriately to my new environment. I still smile at people, and hold open doors for mama's with strollers but I no longer expect a 'thank you' in return. I still say hello when I pass someone in my building, but I no longer expect to hear a response in English. I guess I am adapting.
I have gotten used to not seeing the same shoppes we had back home and I am slowly getting used to be the neighborhood minority (how odd!) I am learning my way around. Today was a little experiment in Harlem for me (Ini was with me, so all was good). I had heard before I came out here about all the changes in Harlem and the gentrification of this old, cultural hub of a neighborhood. Today I saw it first hand. Local stores being pushed out by national chains like H&M and Foot Locker and McDonalds. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy seeing familiar places (Hello, Target!) but there is something to be said about the generic feeling a neighborhood takes on when everything begins to look like everywhere else. The flavor is lost and all turns to vanilla. It's kind of sad.
What is NOT sad however is the local shopping that is left in the area. The local mega-stores that have sales and prices usually reserved for thrift stores. I have always loved finding great deals, and Harlem's 125th street is amazing for this kind of shopping. I daresay it's cheaper and more fun than Michigan shopping :)
After this amazing extravaganza of rack raking, Ini and I returned uptown to check out a new park we hadn't yet hit up. No clue what it was called, but basically, we found ourselves in a kiddie park complete with slides, monkey bars and rope ladders. Luckily there were benches and we were able to sit down and talk without looking too weird. After a while though no matter how inconspicuous one tries to be the reality of being an adult without children in the middle of a playground starts to make the creeper feeling set in, so we headed home earlier than usual.
Upon getting home I got an email from a gal about my nanny posting on craigslist. WOOHOO!! I could be days away from getting a job! I don't know though because as one of her prerequisites according to HER want ad, which she was polite enough to send me in response to MY want ad, she wants a 'recent color photograph included' in my response. Seems a little odd to me, but we will see, if looking at my purty face makes her want to give me a job, I want to know I at least tried... I'll keep you all posted!
Thursday, September 17, 2009
09/15/09
Today was relatively uneventful, Ini was in Queens again hammering out some stuff and I was left to my own devices. I decided to spend the day in pursuit of employment and headed off once again to my local Starbucks. This time there were no parades for local candidates and the 4 block walk was pretty uneventful. I arrived and did the whole resume updating and posting thing and applied to a few nanny agencies and posted a letter seeking employment on Craigslist and then decided to set about working on the blog that I told everyone I would start upon my arrival to the city. What you are reading now is the fruit of those labors. I got everything all set up and squared away and started posting up all my back entries in my journal. I figure this gives all you back home a chance to keep up with me and also gives me a chance to save my mobile minutes ;) I spent all afternoon getting caught up and when Ini got back into the city he picked me up at Starbucks and walked me home (see Mom, I am always safe!). I feel I should also note, I left Michigan exactly one week ago today :)
Since this was a moderately uneventful day, I will take the time and web space to expound upon other things that have been going through my head. This city breaks my heart in new ways everyday. Some days, like yesterday, I ache from the beauty and sense of community. Some days, like today, I break for the poverty and the hopelessness that is so prevalent in so many here. I dont think I will ever get accustomed to people humbling themselves and losing their personal dignity to ask for spare change. The sight of people fishing through trash on the curbs for leftovers or anything salvageable will always shock me. I may have learned to avert my eyes and close my ears to their pleas (it's simply a must in a city where every corner houses someone who is in need), but the truth of the matter resonates in a deeper more private place.
We are living in a lost and broken world. We are living in a world that had lost focus. People seek 'me time' instead of 'knee time.' They turn to themselves as the leaders of their lives and their futures instead of relying on God to be the ruler of their hearts and lives. We compartmentalize religion and God into small, simple, easy to hide boxes that we are too fearful to put out in the open. How can we cry to our President for change and reform in this country when we wont cry to God for reform in our souls?
As a Christian I feel a call to live a life above reproach, to live a life that is a living glorification of my personal Lord and Savior. As a human, I fall wretchedly short. I feel so inadequate so much of the time. As I have said before I feel a call to be here in Manhattan. I feel this is where God wants me, I just don't yet know what I am here for. I see so much need and so many people who hurt and ache and who need to know the love of Christ. All I can do is show the love in small ways and pray for direction. To quote Brandon Heath, "Give me Your eyes for just one second. Give me Your eyes so I can see everything that I keep missing. Give me Your love for humanity." This is my daily prayer as I walk these streets in Washington Heights and Harlem. Lord, let me see how You need me... show me Your will.
Since this was a moderately uneventful day, I will take the time and web space to expound upon other things that have been going through my head. This city breaks my heart in new ways everyday. Some days, like yesterday, I ache from the beauty and sense of community. Some days, like today, I break for the poverty and the hopelessness that is so prevalent in so many here. I dont think I will ever get accustomed to people humbling themselves and losing their personal dignity to ask for spare change. The sight of people fishing through trash on the curbs for leftovers or anything salvageable will always shock me. I may have learned to avert my eyes and close my ears to their pleas (it's simply a must in a city where every corner houses someone who is in need), but the truth of the matter resonates in a deeper more private place.
We are living in a lost and broken world. We are living in a world that had lost focus. People seek 'me time' instead of 'knee time.' They turn to themselves as the leaders of their lives and their futures instead of relying on God to be the ruler of their hearts and lives. We compartmentalize religion and God into small, simple, easy to hide boxes that we are too fearful to put out in the open. How can we cry to our President for change and reform in this country when we wont cry to God for reform in our souls?
As a Christian I feel a call to live a life above reproach, to live a life that is a living glorification of my personal Lord and Savior. As a human, I fall wretchedly short. I feel so inadequate so much of the time. As I have said before I feel a call to be here in Manhattan. I feel this is where God wants me, I just don't yet know what I am here for. I see so much need and so many people who hurt and ache and who need to know the love of Christ. All I can do is show the love in small ways and pray for direction. To quote Brandon Heath, "Give me Your eyes for just one second. Give me Your eyes so I can see everything that I keep missing. Give me Your love for humanity." This is my daily prayer as I walk these streets in Washington Heights and Harlem. Lord, let me see how You need me... show me Your will.
09/14/09- I found TARGET!!
You know how when you are far from home, seeing familiar things makes the distance shrink? I had one of those moments today... Ini took me to Target! It was amazing! Even though the lay-out was slightly tweaked from what I was used to in Holland, it was a familiar place. I recognized brands and products and there was so much of everything, I was in awe. After several days of shopping in local bodegas and pharmacies to see entire aisles dedicated to shampoo and body wash and feminine products was indescribable. I wanted to just wander in circles for the whole day and had I come alone, I probably would have. However, I had brought Ini with me as my official cart-pusher in the store and bag-carrier upon leaving and I felt the urge to show him how efficient I could be in my comsumeristic pursuits.
I had several things to get to make my room feel a little more functional, things like hangers, laundry soap, normal sized bottles of shampoo and conditioner (I had been using travel-sized bottles of Garnier I bought at Duane Reade), power strips (my room has exactly one outlet), I just needed normal things. After only $90 and 7 bags of junk (I so didnt stick exactly to my list) We headed back to the train for the 70 block ride home. I say train, and not subway because we definitely walked up like 45 rickety wooden steps to a platform in the sky to catch the train. I so would have just paid for the convenience of a cab had I been alone!
As is always my luck, I picked the day that my buildings elevator was under construction as the day to go do major shopping, and it's HOT here. Like sticky, no moving air kind of hot... uck, not fun with plastic bags clinging to me... ok not me, him. I carried one measly little bag :) Once all my stuff was dumped in my room, I headed off to get some lunch as this great little middle-eastern place a block down from me called Tabouli. Yeah, I know what all you at home are thinking, 'Regan? Middle Eastern food? Do I have the right blog???' Trust me, you are in the right place. I decided to expand my horizons when I moved here. If I can eat in Michigan, or any other town in the US, I dont want to eat it here. That being said, I began exploring and I discovered chicken shawarmeh... mmmmm... grilled and seasoned chicken in a bed of lettuce with any other veggies you want topped with yogurt and hot sauces and then stuffed and rolled up into a hot fresh pita. Amazing! Beats subway any day (sorry Subway). And it's huge and reasonably priced. for $5 I get the sandwich, a can of soda and a side of rice, not bad for my one major meal a day.
*editors note to Mom and any other concerned parties: No, I am not starving. I just am trying to spend wisely. I keep snacks in my room like crackers and almonds and fruit so I eat more than once daily, I just try to stick to one bigger, store-bought meal a day. That's all. No need to send money or cookies :)*
After lunch, I headed back to my apartment to get situated. I was just stepping into the building when Ini called to let me know his plans had changed and he was now free the rest of the day, and had wanted to give me first dibs on his time. I took off towards his apartment and we hopped a bus, destination unknown.
One thing I have found I love most about this city is the parks. In a world full of concrete and metal, there are these little green, breezy oases, that for even a few moments conceal you from the hub and bub of the city and let you believe you are truly in some small quaint Anytown, USA. I find such peace in these places and love accidentally discovering more little green spots when I go out exploring. With all this in mind, can you guess where he took me? Canya?
If you said Central Park you're right! Sadly, you dont get a prize, just a small sense of personal satisfaction in knowing you are a smart little cookie, and as everyone knows that sooo beats cash or a new car! When we got to the edge of the park, I stood up to get off the bus, wrong answer Regan. We had not yet reached the part he wanted me to see so I had to sit down and be patient (not easy where there is a 70-block long stretch of green staring you in the face). We finally got off about 2 blocks from the northernmost point of the park and as soon as we walked in were faced with the North Pond. Amazing... a pond in the middle of New York, how can anyone not be thrilled?! We walked around the pond til we found a shaded bench where I could just sit and soak it all in. I saw fishies and ducks and tons of dogs and it was all so calm and peaceful. We sat there just absorbing the scenery til the sun started to set then began the long trek back home.
I should point out here that I totally broke my previously mentioned rules and ate Wendy's for dinner with Ini. I not only ate fast food, but at a national chain and for my second meal of the day, tsk tsk.
As my final point, there are moments when I look around that I truly cannot believe I live in this big, congested, over-crowded, incredible, fascinating city. Then I have days like today where it seems smaller, sweeter and feels like home. God is constantly reaffirming me in my decision to chance it and come out here. I am blessed and I am at peace for the first time in a long time. How can anyone not stand in abandon and shout how good the Lord is? I rejoice in the knowledge that my God is bigger than this city, bigger than the moments of loneliness and homesickness I fight. I rest in His strength and in His promise to have plans for my life. God truly is good!!
I had several things to get to make my room feel a little more functional, things like hangers, laundry soap, normal sized bottles of shampoo and conditioner (I had been using travel-sized bottles of Garnier I bought at Duane Reade), power strips (my room has exactly one outlet), I just needed normal things. After only $90 and 7 bags of junk (I so didnt stick exactly to my list) We headed back to the train for the 70 block ride home. I say train, and not subway because we definitely walked up like 45 rickety wooden steps to a platform in the sky to catch the train. I so would have just paid for the convenience of a cab had I been alone!
As is always my luck, I picked the day that my buildings elevator was under construction as the day to go do major shopping, and it's HOT here. Like sticky, no moving air kind of hot... uck, not fun with plastic bags clinging to me... ok not me, him. I carried one measly little bag :) Once all my stuff was dumped in my room, I headed off to get some lunch as this great little middle-eastern place a block down from me called Tabouli. Yeah, I know what all you at home are thinking, 'Regan? Middle Eastern food? Do I have the right blog???' Trust me, you are in the right place. I decided to expand my horizons when I moved here. If I can eat in Michigan, or any other town in the US, I dont want to eat it here. That being said, I began exploring and I discovered chicken shawarmeh... mmmmm... grilled and seasoned chicken in a bed of lettuce with any other veggies you want topped with yogurt and hot sauces and then stuffed and rolled up into a hot fresh pita. Amazing! Beats subway any day (sorry Subway). And it's huge and reasonably priced. for $5 I get the sandwich, a can of soda and a side of rice, not bad for my one major meal a day.
*editors note to Mom and any other concerned parties: No, I am not starving. I just am trying to spend wisely. I keep snacks in my room like crackers and almonds and fruit so I eat more than once daily, I just try to stick to one bigger, store-bought meal a day. That's all. No need to send money or cookies :)*
After lunch, I headed back to my apartment to get situated. I was just stepping into the building when Ini called to let me know his plans had changed and he was now free the rest of the day, and had wanted to give me first dibs on his time. I took off towards his apartment and we hopped a bus, destination unknown.
One thing I have found I love most about this city is the parks. In a world full of concrete and metal, there are these little green, breezy oases, that for even a few moments conceal you from the hub and bub of the city and let you believe you are truly in some small quaint Anytown, USA. I find such peace in these places and love accidentally discovering more little green spots when I go out exploring. With all this in mind, can you guess where he took me? Canya?
If you said Central Park you're right! Sadly, you dont get a prize, just a small sense of personal satisfaction in knowing you are a smart little cookie, and as everyone knows that sooo beats cash or a new car! When we got to the edge of the park, I stood up to get off the bus, wrong answer Regan. We had not yet reached the part he wanted me to see so I had to sit down and be patient (not easy where there is a 70-block long stretch of green staring you in the face). We finally got off about 2 blocks from the northernmost point of the park and as soon as we walked in were faced with the North Pond. Amazing... a pond in the middle of New York, how can anyone not be thrilled?! We walked around the pond til we found a shaded bench where I could just sit and soak it all in. I saw fishies and ducks and tons of dogs and it was all so calm and peaceful. We sat there just absorbing the scenery til the sun started to set then began the long trek back home.
I should point out here that I totally broke my previously mentioned rules and ate Wendy's for dinner with Ini. I not only ate fast food, but at a national chain and for my second meal of the day, tsk tsk.
As my final point, there are moments when I look around that I truly cannot believe I live in this big, congested, over-crowded, incredible, fascinating city. Then I have days like today where it seems smaller, sweeter and feels like home. God is constantly reaffirming me in my decision to chance it and come out here. I am blessed and I am at peace for the first time in a long time. How can anyone not stand in abandon and shout how good the Lord is? I rejoice in the knowledge that my God is bigger than this city, bigger than the moments of loneliness and homesickness I fight. I rest in His strength and in His promise to have plans for my life. God truly is good!!
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
09/13/09
Ahhhh... another solo day in the city! I woke up today and decided to plan out an afternoon and evening of productiveness prior to Ini returning to the City. I busted out my maps (gracias NY Public Library) and set about figuring what I wanted to do. Since I do not have a Master's Degree in City Living, my daily organizing involves two maps, the internet (to verify the accuracy of said maps) and a pen and paper to write down what the maps and internet have told me. I must also complete my entire days planning prior to walking out my front door, because these lovely free maps I got from the library may detail the bus and subway systems in technicolor graphics, but when unfolded they are about 6'x6'. NOTHING screams 'Hey! Come rob me!!' like riding the bus while unfolding a map that's secondary purpose is as twin-size bed sheet. Considering one of my main objectives in this city is to not die... I tend to avoid this particular act of suckerness :)
After 15 minutes and 4 ibuprofin (Even after Rosetta Stone, I am not fluent in MTA heiroglyphics) I realized the place I wanted to go was exactly 4 blocks away and did not technically require bus nor subway... brilliant... So off I walked to Starbucks to use some less-than-free wifi and continue working on my other primary objective, employment.
After walking two blocks in the wrong direction (in my defense, I was heading to a bodega to get a bottle of water) I found myself smack dab in the middle of a random street parade. Apparently, not only did I move to Manhattan 2 days before 9/11, I moved here 6 days before local elections. Ydanis Rodriguez who is running for, ummm, some office or other, had about 600 of his most dedicated supporters following him as he walked up and down Broadway with his wife. I think their was some sort of hierarchy in place here as only about two dozen people were actually allowed to walk with him. Everyone else was following behind him in their cars waving posters and balloons... Apparently, the fella has favorites.
As no parade is complete without extremely loud music, this local show involved two hugely pimped out vehicles (one an SUV and one a 15-passenger van) blasting salsa music into the street. As if THIS wasn't humorous enough (c'mon a 15-seater with subwoofers and a 3' tall speaker in the lap of the front seat passenger?), I was standing next to a lovely conversational woman who began to monologue about how if she wanted displays like this she would have stayed in her native Puerto Rico. I may have been nodding sagely with a serious poker face on the outside, but inside I was dying with laughter. Stuff like this just doesnt happen in Michigan... It was all too much, I got a side cramp from holding back my giggles and ended up taking the bus to starbucks.
After applying for a few more jobs and trudging through more applications it was time to head home (yes, Mom, I am always home before dark). I got home, got cleaned up and met up with Ini when he got back in town (yes, Mom, I go out after dark... but only if accompanied by a responsible New Yorker). We took a late night stroll to a park that overlooks the West Side highway and the Hudson River and provides a lovely view of New Jersey and the Ft Washington Bridge. I should say at this point that New Jersey is quite lovely from afar. In fact, it closely resembles a lit-up Christmas tree. We talked and looked at the scenery and walked around for a bit before parking ourselves on some benches and just having a good discussion that lasted til an unmentionable time in the morning (sorry Mom).
Have I mentioned how nice it is to have him here? Unfortunately, due to some unforeseen circumstances, Ini will be moving back to Queens temporarily next weekend... bummer deal. Until then though, we will keep hanging out and exploring the City. Hopefully, I understand the subway system before he leaves!
*Below are some goofy pictures the girlies and I took today!
Brianna (Cristy's 11 year old cousin and aspiring Model/Singer), Me and Melanie
Cristy (the young lady I live with), Me and Melanie (Cristy's 5 year old cousin)
The girlies... Melanie, Cristy and Brianna
After 15 minutes and 4 ibuprofin (Even after Rosetta Stone, I am not fluent in MTA heiroglyphics) I realized the place I wanted to go was exactly 4 blocks away and did not technically require bus nor subway... brilliant... So off I walked to Starbucks to use some less-than-free wifi and continue working on my other primary objective, employment.
After walking two blocks in the wrong direction (in my defense, I was heading to a bodega to get a bottle of water) I found myself smack dab in the middle of a random street parade. Apparently, not only did I move to Manhattan 2 days before 9/11, I moved here 6 days before local elections. Ydanis Rodriguez who is running for, ummm, some office or other, had about 600 of his most dedicated supporters following him as he walked up and down Broadway with his wife. I think their was some sort of hierarchy in place here as only about two dozen people were actually allowed to walk with him. Everyone else was following behind him in their cars waving posters and balloons... Apparently, the fella has favorites.
As no parade is complete without extremely loud music, this local show involved two hugely pimped out vehicles (one an SUV and one a 15-passenger van) blasting salsa music into the street. As if THIS wasn't humorous enough (c'mon a 15-seater with subwoofers and a 3' tall speaker in the lap of the front seat passenger?), I was standing next to a lovely conversational woman who began to monologue about how if she wanted displays like this she would have stayed in her native Puerto Rico. I may have been nodding sagely with a serious poker face on the outside, but inside I was dying with laughter. Stuff like this just doesnt happen in Michigan... It was all too much, I got a side cramp from holding back my giggles and ended up taking the bus to starbucks.
After applying for a few more jobs and trudging through more applications it was time to head home (yes, Mom, I am always home before dark). I got home, got cleaned up and met up with Ini when he got back in town (yes, Mom, I go out after dark... but only if accompanied by a responsible New Yorker). We took a late night stroll to a park that overlooks the West Side highway and the Hudson River and provides a lovely view of New Jersey and the Ft Washington Bridge. I should say at this point that New Jersey is quite lovely from afar. In fact, it closely resembles a lit-up Christmas tree. We talked and looked at the scenery and walked around for a bit before parking ourselves on some benches and just having a good discussion that lasted til an unmentionable time in the morning (sorry Mom).
Have I mentioned how nice it is to have him here? Unfortunately, due to some unforeseen circumstances, Ini will be moving back to Queens temporarily next weekend... bummer deal. Until then though, we will keep hanging out and exploring the City. Hopefully, I understand the subway system before he leaves!
*Below are some goofy pictures the girlies and I took today!
Brianna (Cristy's 11 year old cousin and aspiring Model/Singer), Me and Melanie
Cristy (the young lady I live with), Me and Melanie (Cristy's 5 year old cousin)
The girlies... Melanie, Cristy and Brianna
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
09/12/09- Living Solo in the City
Well... Today was my first day flying solo in Manhattan. As Ini had stayed in Queens last night, I was alone today... yeah I said it... ALONE. Rough. Very rough. Cried this morning for the first time since leaving MI. However, prior to this morning, I had not yet had a moment of loneliness or homesickness, not even when the train pulled out of the station.
I remember when I moved to Chicago, I had more than a few break-downs. One very public (and embarrassing) scene involved me after about 5 too many Vanilla Screwdrivers (reason #742 I dont really drink anymore) in a bar in downtown Chicago where I had gone to see my buddy Jason Eller (jasoneller.com shameless plug... I know) play a gig. I vaguely remember many many many tears and pleas to just be shoved in the trunk and brought home. I kept on saying how I just wanted to go home. Mind you, all of this done in front of my new coworkers who had accompanied me to the show... I always knew how to make an impression :)
After such a devastating reaction to moving to a place that was less than 4 hours by car from home, I have been waiting for some sort of monumental break down here. After all, I am over 1000 miles from home- 4 hours by plane, 13 by car, and 20 by train. This morning did not live up to my expectations at all. I had a few tears and a few self-pitying thoughts about how tough this was. The End.
It all comes down to this; I know I am supposed to be here. I know the Lord has gone ahead and prepared the city and me for this journey. I am prepared, mentally and emotionally, to have days where I feel alone in a city of 11 million. I am prepared for the urge to tuck tail and run. This time, I will not back down. I feel a call to help those who hurt and who am I to play Jonah and jump ship?
Once the peace settled I decided the best thing I could do was be proactive. One thing I have learned through all my moves and good-byes is that being proactive and keeping myself busy is the best way to fight off the black edges of homesickness. So, I headed off (alone) back to Harlem and the library. After knocking out a few more resumes and applications I headed home. Had I any clue what I was getting into I might have just stayed in Harlem.
A quick editors note, the following story does not include drugs, gangs, shootings or anything so typical, but is equally terrifying- in a funny way.
When I got home, I realized the other adults (Hector and Giselle are their names by the way) were out, leaving me with Cristy (the 12 year old daughter) and Briana (the eleven year old cousin). The girls had decided that daytime is the best time for scary movies and invited me to join them for a matinee viewing of SAW III.
At this point, I suppose I should further expound upon what my living arrangements really are. As mentioned, I live with a family, but I am by no means their 'roommate.' I am a tenant. I pay weekly for the use of their spare room as my home. I have access to the bathroom (duh), but cannot cook in their kitchen. It is not my apartment, so I would never think to waltz out to the living room and plunk down to watch TV. This being said, they are not bad people or mean landlords, this is just how the process works. They have however told me that they believe in a family-like atmosphere and in trusting those they live with. As a result, though I have only been here a few days, they have already extended the use of their fridge until I can buy a mini for my room and offered me their extra TV to put into my room... truly awesome people :)
Okay, now that I am done with that rabbit trail, back to the girls and SAW III. Have you ever tried to watch a truly grossly scary movie with middle school girls? They squawk before the scary parts, they wrap sweaters around their heads and run around screaming at decibels so high you pity the neighborhood dogs. I have not laughed so hard in so long! It was perfect after my mediocre day of blah feelings and resume shipping.
As I wrap up today, I want to mention one more thing to everyone who reads this (how cocky does that sound?) When the moment of emotion hit this morning, I posted my feelings on facebook and was astounded by the responses promising prayer. I know we, as Christians believe in the power of prayer... today I felt the power of prayer. I felt the love of those I left in MI surrounding me and comforting as surely as I can feel a hug. Thank you for your thoughts, thank you for your prayers. I love all of you and miss you terribly.
I remember when I moved to Chicago, I had more than a few break-downs. One very public (and embarrassing) scene involved me after about 5 too many Vanilla Screwdrivers (reason #742 I dont really drink anymore) in a bar in downtown Chicago where I had gone to see my buddy Jason Eller (jasoneller.com shameless plug... I know) play a gig. I vaguely remember many many many tears and pleas to just be shoved in the trunk and brought home. I kept on saying how I just wanted to go home. Mind you, all of this done in front of my new coworkers who had accompanied me to the show... I always knew how to make an impression :)
After such a devastating reaction to moving to a place that was less than 4 hours by car from home, I have been waiting for some sort of monumental break down here. After all, I am over 1000 miles from home- 4 hours by plane, 13 by car, and 20 by train. This morning did not live up to my expectations at all. I had a few tears and a few self-pitying thoughts about how tough this was. The End.
It all comes down to this; I know I am supposed to be here. I know the Lord has gone ahead and prepared the city and me for this journey. I am prepared, mentally and emotionally, to have days where I feel alone in a city of 11 million. I am prepared for the urge to tuck tail and run. This time, I will not back down. I feel a call to help those who hurt and who am I to play Jonah and jump ship?
Once the peace settled I decided the best thing I could do was be proactive. One thing I have learned through all my moves and good-byes is that being proactive and keeping myself busy is the best way to fight off the black edges of homesickness. So, I headed off (alone) back to Harlem and the library. After knocking out a few more resumes and applications I headed home. Had I any clue what I was getting into I might have just stayed in Harlem.
A quick editors note, the following story does not include drugs, gangs, shootings or anything so typical, but is equally terrifying- in a funny way.
When I got home, I realized the other adults (Hector and Giselle are their names by the way) were out, leaving me with Cristy (the 12 year old daughter) and Briana (the eleven year old cousin). The girls had decided that daytime is the best time for scary movies and invited me to join them for a matinee viewing of SAW III.
At this point, I suppose I should further expound upon what my living arrangements really are. As mentioned, I live with a family, but I am by no means their 'roommate.' I am a tenant. I pay weekly for the use of their spare room as my home. I have access to the bathroom (duh), but cannot cook in their kitchen. It is not my apartment, so I would never think to waltz out to the living room and plunk down to watch TV. This being said, they are not bad people or mean landlords, this is just how the process works. They have however told me that they believe in a family-like atmosphere and in trusting those they live with. As a result, though I have only been here a few days, they have already extended the use of their fridge until I can buy a mini for my room and offered me their extra TV to put into my room... truly awesome people :)
Okay, now that I am done with that rabbit trail, back to the girls and SAW III. Have you ever tried to watch a truly grossly scary movie with middle school girls? They squawk before the scary parts, they wrap sweaters around their heads and run around screaming at decibels so high you pity the neighborhood dogs. I have not laughed so hard in so long! It was perfect after my mediocre day of blah feelings and resume shipping.
As I wrap up today, I want to mention one more thing to everyone who reads this (how cocky does that sound?) When the moment of emotion hit this morning, I posted my feelings on facebook and was astounded by the responses promising prayer. I know we, as Christians believe in the power of prayer... today I felt the power of prayer. I felt the love of those I left in MI surrounding me and comforting as surely as I can feel a hug. Thank you for your thoughts, thank you for your prayers. I love all of you and miss you terribly.
09/11/09- Living 9/11 in NYC
Many people asked me prior to my departure what I thought it would be like living in Manhattan on 9/11. My response was always "I don't know." I wish I could say that there was fanfare, or an immediate feeling of family along the streets, but honestly it felt much like my previous first days in the city. Perhaps because I am living so far removed from Ground Zero, or perhaps because I am not a New Yorker, it all felt 'normal' (as normal as things can feel in a city or eleventy billion people). Buses ran, businesses were open, people ignored each other in the ways only a true New Yorker can.
Me, I spent my day trying to find gainful employment. As much as I have enjoyed having a few days to get settled, I need to work. I get antsy and lonely and needy and overall unenjoyable when I feel purposeless. So, Ini took me to the library, smack in the middle of Harlem in 125th st I began my search for a job that will be both fulfilling and profitable. With the departing words of 'dont talk to people unless you have to,' he abandoned me to resume reconstruction and the endless task of cover letter revision, while he headed off to queens for the afternoon, promising to pick me up on his way home. Afterall, I was almost 40 blocks from home and still not super quick with the bus system.
All in all it was a super productive day and I feel like I made a lot of headway. I was just getting in a grove using this website I found geared entirely towards non-profit jobs when all of a sudden I notice everyone around me packing up their stuff. Me, I was busy following directions and speaking to no one, not even making eye contact with the people sharing my table (I am going to be a GREAT New Yorker!). So, with my headphones stuffed in my ears and I had missed the announcement of a 5pm closing time. Hells bells! It's my second day in the City, my personal chaperon is 2 hours away in Queens (I still dont know what direction that is from me) and I have to figure out how to get myself home.
Upon walking outside, I immediately know which direction home is, as I can see Broadway street, but none of the bus numbers match the ones that run by my house. So, I set myself in a northward-bound direction and begin walking.
I may not have mentioned it before, but it rained... ALL DAY on 9/11, that was the only unusual thing about the day. I truly believe it was God crying over the city. Now rain in NYC is NOTHING like rain I have experienced anywhere else, except maybe downtown Chicago. Because of the grid-like pattern of the city and the tall buildings it rains almost straight sideways. Then once the sky has finished dumping on your head, the rooftops start. Most of the buildings here have flat roofs... as the wind blows across... well... you get the idea. A cold, misty/drizzly wetness that not only serves to soak you under your umbrella, but works in a secondary fashion to clean off the rooftops. Lord only knows what blew on me today... Yuck!
To make a long story short, after 8 blocks of walking uphill, I finally saw a bus stop featuring numbers that looked familiar and I made my way home alone. Not too shabby for a first solo outing.
The rest of the evening was spent staying home, staying dry and finishing one of the books I brought from home...
Me, I spent my day trying to find gainful employment. As much as I have enjoyed having a few days to get settled, I need to work. I get antsy and lonely and needy and overall unenjoyable when I feel purposeless. So, Ini took me to the library, smack in the middle of Harlem in 125th st I began my search for a job that will be both fulfilling and profitable. With the departing words of 'dont talk to people unless you have to,' he abandoned me to resume reconstruction and the endless task of cover letter revision, while he headed off to queens for the afternoon, promising to pick me up on his way home. Afterall, I was almost 40 blocks from home and still not super quick with the bus system.
All in all it was a super productive day and I feel like I made a lot of headway. I was just getting in a grove using this website I found geared entirely towards non-profit jobs when all of a sudden I notice everyone around me packing up their stuff. Me, I was busy following directions and speaking to no one, not even making eye contact with the people sharing my table (I am going to be a GREAT New Yorker!). So, with my headphones stuffed in my ears and I had missed the announcement of a 5pm closing time. Hells bells! It's my second day in the City, my personal chaperon is 2 hours away in Queens (I still dont know what direction that is from me) and I have to figure out how to get myself home.
Upon walking outside, I immediately know which direction home is, as I can see Broadway street, but none of the bus numbers match the ones that run by my house. So, I set myself in a northward-bound direction and begin walking.
I may not have mentioned it before, but it rained... ALL DAY on 9/11, that was the only unusual thing about the day. I truly believe it was God crying over the city. Now rain in NYC is NOTHING like rain I have experienced anywhere else, except maybe downtown Chicago. Because of the grid-like pattern of the city and the tall buildings it rains almost straight sideways. Then once the sky has finished dumping on your head, the rooftops start. Most of the buildings here have flat roofs... as the wind blows across... well... you get the idea. A cold, misty/drizzly wetness that not only serves to soak you under your umbrella, but works in a secondary fashion to clean off the rooftops. Lord only knows what blew on me today... Yuck!
To make a long story short, after 8 blocks of walking uphill, I finally saw a bus stop featuring numbers that looked familiar and I made my way home alone. Not too shabby for a first solo outing.
The rest of the evening was spent staying home, staying dry and finishing one of the books I brought from home...
09/10/09
The City that never sleeps, surely is not allowing me much shut eye right now. I woke bolt upright this morning at 4:45am in the Alga all alone (a minor miscommunication put my friend in his bed at his apartment instead of on the lovely hotel couch where I thought he was going to be). After a few (read 25) minutes of panic I decided to be super-brave and plan my day by myself. After taking that much needed all-body wash shower and getting primped and ready, I began exploring the color-coded insanity that is the MTA online transit map. It looks strikingly similar to the art my two year olds used to produce when I taught preschool.
After several minutes and a few quick Rosetta Stone classes I was able to decipher the Manhattan Transit Authorities secret language and figure out where I needed to go to get back to where I started yesterday and get me a phone charger! I was all ready to go out and conquer Manhattan, like the street-savvy city slicker Holland, MI had prepared me to be.
Luckily, Ini picked that moment to show up and save me from my own delusions. Y'all might think I am gutsy for moving out here alone; but tackling NY subways without a Masters Degree in city-living is truly crazy!
With the help of my personal guide/bodyguard, I got a phone charger, ate the first real meal I had eaten since leaving my parents place in Michigan (I subsisted on granola bars, raw almonds and freeze-dried fruit on the train), inquired about a PO Box, explored a multi-story 99-cent store, took the subway and bus (after acquiring an unlimited Metra Card for me), wandered up and down Broadway St to familiarize myself with my new neighborhood and got me a room in an apartment! Yay for not being homeless!!
I am now renting a HUGE (even by Michigan standards) room from a lovely family that consists of a dad, a mom, a twelve year old daughter and a 6 month old baby boy. I live on 164th Avenue between Broadway and St. Nicholas in the area known as Washington Heights. I LOVE IT! My street is reasonably quiet (for NY standards), Broadway is full of amazing shopping and food places and local stores. The area is mostly Hispanic and everywhere you walk (including the inside of my building) the air smells so good your mouth waters.
People here are also generally nice. I have already found a nice corner Pharmacy to get my necessary supplies and the prices are pretty reasonable. I've met a couple people from my building and they seem pretty nice as well.
It's true people dont go out of their way to say hello, or even to make eye-contact, but if you are polite first (without looking all bug-eyed touristy) they are polite back... Sometimes they even smile ;)
Before I left Michigan, my brother and his wife gave me a good-bye card. In her message to me, my sister-in-law told me to remember that God was going before me on this journey. I have most definitely seen evidence of that in these first few days of what looks to be a most excellent adventure!!
The City that never sleeps, surely is not allowing me much shut eye right now. I woke bolt upright this morning at 4:45am in the Alga all alone (a minor miscommunication put my friend in his bed at his apartment instead of on the lovely hotel couch where I thought he was going to be). After a few (read 25) minutes of panic I decided to be super-brave and plan my day by myself. After taking that much needed all-body wash shower and getting primped and ready, I began exploring the color-coded insanity that is the MTA online transit map. It looks strikingly similar to the art my two year olds used to produce when I taught preschool.
After several minutes and a few quick Rosetta Stone classes I was able to decipher the Manhattan Transit Authorities secret language and figure out where I needed to go to get back to where I started yesterday and get me a phone charger! I was all ready to go out and conquer Manhattan, like the street-savvy city slicker Holland, MI had prepared me to be.
Luckily, Ini picked that moment to show up and save me from my own delusions. Y'all might think I am gutsy for moving out here alone; but tackling NY subways without a Masters Degree in city-living is truly crazy!
With the help of my personal guide/bodyguard, I got a phone charger, ate the first real meal I had eaten since leaving my parents place in Michigan (I subsisted on granola bars, raw almonds and freeze-dried fruit on the train), inquired about a PO Box, explored a multi-story 99-cent store, took the subway and bus (after acquiring an unlimited Metra Card for me), wandered up and down Broadway St to familiarize myself with my new neighborhood and got me a room in an apartment! Yay for not being homeless!!
I am now renting a HUGE (even by Michigan standards) room from a lovely family that consists of a dad, a mom, a twelve year old daughter and a 6 month old baby boy. I live on 164th Avenue between Broadway and St. Nicholas in the area known as Washington Heights. I LOVE IT! My street is reasonably quiet (for NY standards), Broadway is full of amazing shopping and food places and local stores. The area is mostly Hispanic and everywhere you walk (including the inside of my building) the air smells so good your mouth waters.
People here are also generally nice. I have already found a nice corner Pharmacy to get my necessary supplies and the prices are pretty reasonable. I've met a couple people from my building and they seem pretty nice as well.
It's true people dont go out of their way to say hello, or even to make eye-contact, but if you are polite first (without looking all bug-eyed touristy) they are polite back... Sometimes they even smile ;)
Before I left Michigan, my brother and his wife gave me a good-bye card. In her message to me, my sister-in-law told me to remember that God was going before me on this journey. I have most definitely seen evidence of that in these first few days of what looks to be a most excellent adventure!!
09/09/09 Arrival
11pm-ish 09/09/09
Well- I ARRIVED! My friend, Ini, was there waiting right on the platform. Best surprise ever! I didn't even have to try to navigate upstairs Penn Station looking for him. Bill, my across-the-aisle buddy was all prepared to chaperone me upstairs and baby-sit me til I found I found my Manhattan Greeting Committee, luckily, I didnt need a sitter, I felt a bit silly at my naivete.
Baggage took forever to make its way upstairs, but once we got my (4) bags it was up the escalator and *plop* out onto the streets of Manhattan! I never knew Penn Station was underground beneath Madison Square Gardens. I feel like half this city exists under ground. Totally explains the roach issue.
Ini was kind enough to book a hotel for me somewhat near his apartment (a measly 12 blocks) so I can be close-by on my first night in the city and feel a little more secure. I will not say the hotel is ucky; it isnt, but it does bring new meaning to 'shabby-chic' and vintage.
The Alga Hotel is a semi-converted apartment building that maintains some permanent residents and rents out the rest of its furnished rooms for 12-hour stretches, which works out perfectly since I want to be up and out early in the morning. My room(s) include a living room area with tons of seating and tables and a dresser. I could fit a dozen people in here and no one would have to rest their buns on a seat like any one else's (i.e. nothing matches *wink*). Yet it all coordinates in a vintage/shabby/eclectic type of way. The chic is just a given since, well, I am in Manhattan. I am so geeked about being off the train the furniture could have been made from re-formed pop-bottles and I still wouldnt mind. After 6 days on my friends couch and almost 20 hours on a train, the Alga closely resembles Heaven... Until I realized I have no shampoo and will be washing hair with White Gardenia Shower Gel from Bath and Body Works... Brilliant! Oh! and I have no phone charger, so all the gabby "I am safe in New York and here's what I have seen so far," phone calls are being put on hold. (Since I couldnt call anyone, here's what I have seen so far- 34th St, Madison Square, One angry crack head, 6,000 taxi cabs, the Hudson River and New Jersey). Bummer deal, not quite what I was expecting my first night in the city.
Luckily, I have great company in the form of Ini (my personal city-guide, body guard and all around New York expert) and am honestly too pooped to mind too much about the lack of shampoo or the dead phone. I am preparing to pass out now while Ini is preparing to lug the second load of my luggage the twelve blocks to his apartment so it will be out of the way while we run around town tomorrow getting me settled. The first load involved 2 wheeled suitcases (one of which has a broken wheel), and a lovely a flowered carry-on, this one will be a little easier, just one manly blue suitcase. He is such a blessing to have around. I cannot imagine how hard this would have been without someone to help show me the ropes and ease the burden.
Well- I ARRIVED! My friend, Ini, was there waiting right on the platform. Best surprise ever! I didn't even have to try to navigate upstairs Penn Station looking for him. Bill, my across-the-aisle buddy was all prepared to chaperone me upstairs and baby-sit me til I found I found my Manhattan Greeting Committee, luckily, I didnt need a sitter, I felt a bit silly at my naivete.
Baggage took forever to make its way upstairs, but once we got my (4) bags it was up the escalator and *plop* out onto the streets of Manhattan! I never knew Penn Station was underground beneath Madison Square Gardens. I feel like half this city exists under ground. Totally explains the roach issue.
Ini was kind enough to book a hotel for me somewhat near his apartment (a measly 12 blocks) so I can be close-by on my first night in the city and feel a little more secure. I will not say the hotel is ucky; it isnt, but it does bring new meaning to 'shabby-chic' and vintage.
The Alga Hotel is a semi-converted apartment building that maintains some permanent residents and rents out the rest of its furnished rooms for 12-hour stretches, which works out perfectly since I want to be up and out early in the morning. My room(s) include a living room area with tons of seating and tables and a dresser. I could fit a dozen people in here and no one would have to rest their buns on a seat like any one else's (i.e. nothing matches *wink*). Yet it all coordinates in a vintage/shabby/eclectic type of way. The chic is just a given since, well, I am in Manhattan. I am so geeked about being off the train the furniture could have been made from re-formed pop-bottles and I still wouldnt mind. After 6 days on my friends couch and almost 20 hours on a train, the Alga closely resembles Heaven... Until I realized I have no shampoo and will be washing hair with White Gardenia Shower Gel from Bath and Body Works... Brilliant! Oh! and I have no phone charger, so all the gabby "I am safe in New York and here's what I have seen so far," phone calls are being put on hold. (Since I couldnt call anyone, here's what I have seen so far- 34th St, Madison Square, One angry crack head, 6,000 taxi cabs, the Hudson River and New Jersey). Bummer deal, not quite what I was expecting my first night in the city.
Luckily, I have great company in the form of Ini (my personal city-guide, body guard and all around New York expert) and am honestly too pooped to mind too much about the lack of shampoo or the dead phone. I am preparing to pass out now while Ini is preparing to lug the second load of my luggage the twelve blocks to his apartment so it will be out of the way while we run around town tomorrow getting me settled. The first load involved 2 wheeled suitcases (one of which has a broken wheel), and a lovely a flowered carry-on, this one will be a little easier, just one manly blue suitcase. He is such a blessing to have around. I cannot imagine how hard this would have been without someone to help show me the ropes and ease the burden.
09/08/09- Leaving on a Midnight Train
11:46 pm 09/08/09
So here I am sitting on the Lakeshore #48 straight-bound from South Bend, IN to Penn Station; Island of Manhattan, City of New York. I have 18 hours and 55 minutes to figure out what I am really doing... I believe I am making a change for the better. I feel a call to do more than just sing Happy Birthday and bring Pepsi refills. That isn't to say I didn't genuinely enjoy my job. I like making people happy at the end of a long day and being a part, however small, in their big moments. I am just ready for MORE!
I want to do BIG things, see BIG places and make a positive change for The Kingdom. I feel called to help those who hurt; I just don't know how yet. I trust the Lord to guide me and show me the plans He has for me.
... I seem to have thoroughly lucked out on this trip- NO SEAT MATE! There is a pretty cool fella sitting across the aisle from me. His name's Bill and he worked for the city of NY in youth and social services for 20+ years. He has some great ideas about places to apply and programs to look into. What a God-thing!
... I spoke too soon! As soon as I finished writing about my lack of seat mate, I made the mistake of asking a blind man who was fumbling to open the train door if he needed help finding the button clearly marked 'Press to Open.' Turns out he is most certainly NOT visually impaired, just blind-drunk. He then proceeded to fall into the seat next to me in all his smelly-drooly drunk wonder and pass out. Brilliant. My Midwest manners prohibited me from complaining. Luckily, Bill, my aisle mate has a little more New Yorker in him and promptly got the conductor to remove Drunk Fella from my personal space before he chucked up all over me. Guess I need to toughen up a bit before the Big Apple bites me.
... I told everyone that I was taking the train because I wanted to really see more of the country- leave it to me to pick the only seat in the entire car with no window! However, if I sit tilted towards the wall and crane my neck just right I can see a 6" span of America. We have already passed all our long stops' Toledo, Cleveland, Buffalo, Syracuse and Albany and are in the home-stretch barreling towards Manhattan. I am amazed all this diverse landscape can be part of the same state. I am passing through sheer walled cliffs of rock and huge sprawling hilly areas covered in trees. Replace the rock with sand and it almost feels lime Michigan. The homes here are breathtaking too- designed to fit in and reflect the nature surrounding them. I dont honestly know what I was expecting from Upstate New York, but this is exceptional.
... 6:05pm, 09/09/09
Okay, so I am sitting in Penn Station- we are 30 minutes early and are now stuck on the tracks because we arent supposed to be here yet. There's a line of trains ahead of us that get first dibs on the platforms. All I want is a hot shower, a bed and a hug from my friend who is meeting me at the station... Can't wait to see him!!!
So here I am sitting on the Lakeshore #48 straight-bound from South Bend, IN to Penn Station; Island of Manhattan, City of New York. I have 18 hours and 55 minutes to figure out what I am really doing... I believe I am making a change for the better. I feel a call to do more than just sing Happy Birthday and bring Pepsi refills. That isn't to say I didn't genuinely enjoy my job. I like making people happy at the end of a long day and being a part, however small, in their big moments. I am just ready for MORE!
I want to do BIG things, see BIG places and make a positive change for The Kingdom. I feel called to help those who hurt; I just don't know how yet. I trust the Lord to guide me and show me the plans He has for me.
... I seem to have thoroughly lucked out on this trip- NO SEAT MATE! There is a pretty cool fella sitting across the aisle from me. His name's Bill and he worked for the city of NY in youth and social services for 20+ years. He has some great ideas about places to apply and programs to look into. What a God-thing!
... I spoke too soon! As soon as I finished writing about my lack of seat mate, I made the mistake of asking a blind man who was fumbling to open the train door if he needed help finding the button clearly marked 'Press to Open.' Turns out he is most certainly NOT visually impaired, just blind-drunk. He then proceeded to fall into the seat next to me in all his smelly-drooly drunk wonder and pass out. Brilliant. My Midwest manners prohibited me from complaining. Luckily, Bill, my aisle mate has a little more New Yorker in him and promptly got the conductor to remove Drunk Fella from my personal space before he chucked up all over me. Guess I need to toughen up a bit before the Big Apple bites me.
... I told everyone that I was taking the train because I wanted to really see more of the country- leave it to me to pick the only seat in the entire car with no window! However, if I sit tilted towards the wall and crane my neck just right I can see a 6" span of America. We have already passed all our long stops' Toledo, Cleveland, Buffalo, Syracuse and Albany and are in the home-stretch barreling towards Manhattan. I am amazed all this diverse landscape can be part of the same state. I am passing through sheer walled cliffs of rock and huge sprawling hilly areas covered in trees. Replace the rock with sand and it almost feels lime Michigan. The homes here are breathtaking too- designed to fit in and reflect the nature surrounding them. I dont honestly know what I was expecting from Upstate New York, but this is exceptional.
... 6:05pm, 09/09/09
Okay, so I am sitting in Penn Station- we are 30 minutes early and are now stuck on the tracks because we arent supposed to be here yet. There's a line of trains ahead of us that get first dibs on the platforms. All I want is a hot shower, a bed and a hug from my friend who is meeting me at the station... Can't wait to see him!!!
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